Tag Archives: Bob Conley

I still hate the smell of “Rich Corinthian Leather.”

“Boys, guess what I drove home.”

My Dad worked for car dealers while I was growing up in Statesboro, Georgia. He began at a Toyota dealership, then transferred to another marquee, Chevrolet.  Subsequent moves to the local Ford and Dodge dealers whet my appetite for automobiles.  Dad would often leave with the family car in the morning and show up for supper with another ride that was a “steal of a deal” or, in other words, the used car manager knew nobody else would buy it.

AMC Pacer, AMC Gremlin, & two big arse Pontiac Woodies

We ended up with a an AMC Pacer, an AMC Gremlin, and two Pontiac Station Wagons with big V-8 engines that some college professor traded in…Dad couldn’t resist the faux wood glued to the side slabs of the tanks and came home with both of them.  Those cars set him back about $150…yes, for…two…automobiles.  We parked them end-to-end in the back yard in Edgewood Acres.  Subsequently, Mr. Hubert Clark, our next door neighbor built a wooden fence for “privacy”…and to keep me and my brother out of his pool and from chasing his pretty daughter, Rosemary.

Keg Parties next door in Edgewood Acres 

Mr. Bob Worthington, our other neighbor, took the eyesores in stride. He just invited Father Lucree and some of the (From The Land of Black Socks and Sandals) Catholic Brigade in Edgewood Acres for a keg party and 27 successive renditions of “Michael Row the Boat Ashore” on Saturday night after Mass.

Of course, I think Mr. Bob enjoyed sticking it to Dad knowing that the soft acoustic guitar and those out-of-tune harmonies floating in through the screened-in windows were keeping the owner of Edgewood’s biggest fleet of used automobiles from enjoying a good night’s sleep.  After all, my Baptist preacher Dad had to be ready to throw some brimstone in the fire on Sunday morning.  And, after a bad night’s sleep, he had no problem throwing more wood on that smoldering pile.

“..take a ride, ride, ride, ride on Heavy Metal…(and fiberglass)”

One of our neighbors, Mr. Kenny Stone, was a newly minted lawyer from the University of Georgia.  As a reward for passing the bar, he got married and bought a Corvette…a ’78 or ’79.  He’s a friendly guy and babied that black beauty.  Like every one of my first kisses with a neighborhood honey, I plainly remember that I only managed to snag a ride in that C3 once…the first time I had ever graced the seat of a Vette.  Sweet; it smelled good…had red leather and, man, were we low to the ground!  I didn’t mind being bitten by the Mako Shark-inspired design and I’ve wanted a 1980-1982 ever since.
Corvette C3 from Maxie Price Corvette World on the showroom floor

“Volare'” and…

the F-U-R-Y

and the Plymouth “Hell Hath No” Fury for style.  One time, Dad “accidentally” backed the Fury into my Mama’s car twice…within ten seconds apart.  He didn’t drink at all and I can only guess that he was going to test-drive another Chrysler laden with “Rich Corinthian Leather” aka Pitted Vinyl with Vaseline smeared on it.
Enjoy the Plymouth Fury commercial with Arthur Godfrey and then relive the olfactory paradise that drove women wild in the Cordoba.  Just deliver those sweet nothings to your lady with that smooth Ricardo Montalban’ accent and…steamy windows here we come!

A 1967 Mercury Cougar and a 1967 Ford Mustang…ones that got away

I still have an affinity for vehicles and yeah, we had a bunch of four doors that fit all of us since we were a very close family. The Vette’s were a totally impractical choice for our ride but we did have a pretty burgundy ’67 Ford Mustang and a metallic green ’67 Mercury Cougar whose only blemish was a front seat that had a few small cracks.  A little old lady really did have own the Merc and it was gorgeous to be twenty years old.  Dad still regrets selling both of these.  They were fun to drive and had nice lines and we loved cruising around in them.  It’s funny but I can remember how that Cougar seemed almost new inside and out.  I think I’m gonna be sick.

Here’s a commercial for the ’67 Cougar…Motor Trend’s Car of the Year. It’s got the big cat (a cougar, I guess) that growls. I always liked those ads.

Lincoln Mercury sponsored “THE FBI” with Efrem Zimbalist, Jr. and you have to admit the intros were good.

And for those of you who bothered to read this far, here’s a commercial for a Mercury Cougar with Farrah Fawcett Majors:

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Zaxby’s – let me know if you find a better chicken joint.

Every few months, I make the short trek to Thomson, Georgia, from Gwinnett County to meet my folks and leave one of my children for a visit to my childhood home in God’s Country, Bulloch County. We usually meet at the Zaxby’s since everybody likes the food.

When I meet my folks in Thomson, we always share a meal at the Zaxby's right next to I-20.
When I meet my folks in Thomson, we always share a meal at the Zaxby’s right next to I-20.

This past Saturday, the day was beautiful and sunny. I took my daughter to meet Mama and Dad at the appointed Zaxby’s. When we got there at noon, fifteen or twenty people were already in line…none of them were my parents.  It hadn’t been that long since I’d seen them and I think I would have recognized them.  We waited about three more minutes and they pulled up in the parking lot. By the time that we got in line, only 3 or 4 people were ahead of us. The line was really moving quickly.

Mama and my daughter wanted the House Zalads with fried chicken, Dad got the #1 Chicken Finger Plate, and I got the Grilled Sandwich Sandwich Meal.  I always get Sweet Tea and dilute it with some Unsweet just in case somebody dropped the sugar bowl in the tea pitcher (hello, Chick-fil-A and McDonald’s!)  Note to self:  buy a Zaxby’s Ice Machine…oh man, that ice is perfect!

I can’t remember anything.

Anyway, we got our order from Christian, the friendly blond behind the counter.  Her manager was helping out.  She was very nice as well.  We didn’t talk to anybody else although I did make four trips back to the counter for the food…then ketchup that I forgot…then a Diet Coke for Dad…then a water bottle that didn’t make it on the tray.  I know one brunette that I kept walking by must have thought I was hitting on her…or either she recognized me from the “Don’t Take Checks From This Man” photo on the counter next to the cash register.

Zaxby's Tea and ICE...the ICE from Zaxby's has it's own Facebook Page!
Zaxby’s Tea and ICE…the ICE from Zaxby’s has it’s own Facebook Page!

Everybody gobbled up their food.  My sandwich was good with the perfect amount of Zax Sauce on it.  The fries were spot on…not too greasy.  Dad acted surprised that he ate all five of his chicken fingers but I don’t know who he thought he was fooling.  Mama and my lil’ girl must have enjoyed there Zalads since they didn’t leave hardly a crumb.

I checked the Men’s bathroom; it was clean and tidy.  The music was pleasant..some eighties hits.

The Final Verdict is In

This Zaxby’s I’ll give a 9.3 on a 10 scale.  The only thing that might could be improved was the room temperature.  It was too cool for some patrons who had thrown on coats…in August.

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John Robert Conley Atlanta restaurants